2010, 2011 PRSA WI Paragon Award of Excellence

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A Dummy's Puppet's Ramblings - from Chip Martin
Mannequin American views and guidelines on marketing/PR trends, news from the world of puppets and ventriloquism, bits of humor and other interesting but useless information. I post every Tuesday and Friday.
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December 2018 - Posts

Is This Chip's Last Blog?

A Puppet's Ramblings - from Chip Martin, Mannequin American Marketer
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Is This Chip’s Last Blog?

A year ago, I announced that after ten years of continuous publication, 2018 would be the final year for this blog. I’ve researched and written over 2,000 blogs to date … and probably published more ventriloquist-related cartoons than any other social media site in history.




Initially the blog included marketing tips along with examples of what I thought were effective uses of humor to sell products and services. I also shared occasional items about puppets (Mannequin Americans), ventriloquists and ventriloquism. Along the way, the blog won a few awards and slowly built a substantial following.



But, times have changed. Political correctness has made it incredibly difficult for marketers to use “humor” as a viable advertising/marketing tool. As a result, it has become more difficult and time consuming to find entertaining and effective examples of humor in advertising/marketing to share with readers.

What was once a fresh, new, exciting way to share entertaining marketing concepts, has, unfortunately, morphed into amusing signs, photos that I find funny, and all too rare glimpses of humorous marketing endeavors. As a result, followers of this blog have dwindled from thousands to just a couple hundred.

The remaining followers, led by Chuck Lyons, the most faithful reader any blog writer could hope to attract, appear to be a very loyal, (albeit a very small) group. The conundrum this presents me with is “Do I continue to spend significant time researching and publishing the blog for my friends?” or do I “Bail on this endeavor and find a new hobby?”

Leslie reminded me that she knows several people who repost my bi-weekly Chip Shots on bulletin boards and other places. (For those individuals, here are 10 Chip Shots that never made the cut.)

Chip Shot: The difference between surfing and snowboarding is just the temperature of the water.

Chip Shot: Can you bruise your liver? Asking for a friend.

Chip Shot: The older you get the uglier you’re willing to go out in public.

Chip Shot: I’m so lonely I had to throw myself a surprise birthday party.

Chip Shot: Dating is just hanging out with someone until you figure out what’s wrong with them.

Chip Shot: Dentist: “This is going to hurt a little bit.” Me: “Okay.” Dentist. “I’ve been sleeping with your mom.”

Chip Shot: Me: “I’m exhausted.” Fitbit: “You have taken 9 steps today.”

Chip Shot: It takes thirty-seven muscles to frown. But it takes zero muscles to shut the fu#@ up.

Chip Shot: Today’s inspirational quote; “Don’t be a dick.”

Chip Shot: Are your kids fussy eaters, or are you just a terrible cook?


Chip Shots aside, I feel at the very least, I owe Chuck Lyons a few more blogs. So, here’s my decision. I may miss a few Wednesdays or Fridays, but my goal is to publish Chip’s Blog for another year. (Shot pause, for 3 people to stop cheering.)

If you don’t expect much, you won’t be disappointed. Thanks for reading and have a healthy, creative and prosperous New Year.

Chip Martin (Mannequin American)


Operation Kevin ... You'll Laugh at This

A Puppet's Ramblings - from Chip Martin, Mannequin American Marketer
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Chip Shot: Every morning for the past six months I loudly announce that I’m going jogging, but then I don’t go. It’s my longest running joke of the year.

Operation Kevin … You’ll Laugh at This




Okay, here’s the newest ad for Google. It stars Macaulay Culkin, (he’s 38 now, in case you want to feel old) and takes place in the house from Home Alone.

Vintage Ads



For some reason the headline for this ad reminded me of Al Getler.



Using sex to sell cars … I miss those days.




The mother who thought this was a good idea, should have been shot.

Signs That Caught My Glass Eyes



Modern Nativity








You Gotta See This Entertaining, Multi-Tasking Bartender

A Puppet's Ramblings - from Chip Martin, Mannequin American Marketer.
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Chip Shot: Dylan owns six swords. To calculate how often Dylan has had sex, multiply the number of swords he owns by the number zero.




Amazingly Talented, Multi-tasking Nashville Bartender



I think I may want to marry this woman. At the very least I want to drink where she works. And if this doesn’t demonstrate how competitive the music business is in Nashville, nothing does.

Truth in Drugs





Vintage Shoe Ads



I think you’re supposed to wear boots when riding a motorcycle. It would be hard to shift in those high heels, not to mention burning your ankles on the exhaust.


$5 for dress shoes. Guess the “New Name” in shoes didn’t last long enough to become an “recognized name.”


Buster Brown shoes were advertised during Saturday morning kids shows in the 50’s.



That’ll build self-esteem in all the boys whose parents didn’t buy them Keds!

For All You Free Lancers Out There



“Have You Been Drinking, Sir?”



In an entertaining 30 second manner, Lyft reminds us of all the reasons to avoid driving.




Vintage Offensive Movie Posters

A Puppet's Ramblings - from Chip Martin, Mannequin American Marketer
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Chip Shot: Marry someone who looks sexy while being disappointed.

Signs That Caught My Glass Eyes









Vintage Ads That Wouldn’t Fly Today



Malt “supplies nourishing qualities” for mom and baby! So that’s why mom was always hammered.




They date other people? What a concept. Probably offensive to some.


“Human Mileage” counts. So, I guess she’s worth about $1.55?


This is so offensive it must hurt feminists’ eyes.

Vintage Offensive Movie Posters




Carole Lombard was white, so I guess no harm, no foul?



I think they meant she was a bad speller or something.

Funny Slovenian Bakery AD



From Slovenia comes this entertaining little ad for Bauli Bakery items.





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